Rayne, Rayne, Don’t Go Away

No one wins in a custody battle, especially the child.  My wife and I…because we are lesbians…have had to fight for custody of our children.  The battles were long, draining, maddening, and largely unnecessary.  There is another custody battle brewing in our family…but this one we have no legal say in, even though it affects us deeply.  Kathleen and I have a grandson, Rayne…he is the son of Joseph…he will be four next month.  We all love and miss him so very much.

As grandparents we have little to no say in Rayne’s life…not that we think that we should, we just want to see him.  I’m going to be honest here…we are not allowed to see Rayne because we are lesbians…wait, I’m not over reacting or misreading the situation.  Rayne’s maternal grandparents, who are caring for him right now, believe that access to Kathleen and I will, “make Rayne a fairy”… yes, that is a quote. I realise that I live in the most right-wing, red-neck part of Canada, but really, are they serious?

This post is not meant to sway anyone who does have a say in Rayne’s life, to suddenly realise that they are neanderthals…sorry that just slipped out…and no, I am not bitter. :)…no one involved even knows I have a blog.  I’m not naive enough to believe that a blog entry is suddenly going to change their minds.  I did say we have five children, and we do…Rayne will always be a part of this family, even if we are not allowed to see him. 

Rayne and Claire

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8 thoughts on “Rayne, Rayne, Don’t Go Away

  1. I am not a lesbian but I believe you should be able to see Rayne. That is so sad. I have 5 grandkids by my oldest son and if I don’t go see them I never would see them. Sometimes life sucks. I will pray for you.Have a nice weekend.

  2. I feel so saddened when I hear of stories like this, it’s just not right of them to cut you out of his life like that. I hope they change their minds. Keep positive x

  3. This is crazy!! I am so sorry to hear that . . . I don’t know much about family law, but I thought grandparents do have some rights to access??? What a strange, ill world we live in when folks believe that less love is better than more love for a child. Having worked in human rights for some time, it makes me crazy that this sort of thing finds little support from the legal system, when all the other craziness eats up tax-payers money. Keep trying.

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