Rayne, Rayne Don”t Go Away

No one wins in a custody battle, especially the child.  My wife and I…because we are lesbians…have had to fight for custody of our children.  The battles were long, draining, maddening, and largely unnecessary.  There is another custody battle brewing in our family…but this one we have no legal say in, even though it affects us deeply.  Kathleen and I have a grandson, Rayne…he is the son of Joseph…he will be four next month.  We all love and miss him so very much.

As grandparents we have little to no say in Rayne’s life…not that we think that we should, we just want to see him.  I’m going to be honest here…we are not allowed to see Rayne because we are lesbians…wait, I’m not over reacting or misreading the situation.  Rayne’s maternal grandparents, who are caring for him right now, believe that access to Kathleen and I will, “make Rayne a fairy”… yes, that is a quote. I realise that I live in the most right-wing, red-neck part of Canada, but really, are they serious?

This post is not meant to sway anyone who does have a say in Rayne’s life, to suddenly realise that they are neanderthals…sorry that just slipped out…and no, I am not bitter. :)…no one involved even knows I have a blog.  I’m not naive enough to believe that a blog entry is suddenly going to change their minds.  I did say we have five children, and we do…Rayne will always be a part of this family, even if we are not allowed to see him.

God Bless, Julia 

Rayne and Claire

8 thoughts on “Rayne, Rayne Don”t Go Away

  1. you can think this random, i just happened to come across this and i want to say you seem like great parents/grandparents. im sure he’s grown up to be beautiful 🙂

  2. It actually seems inappropriate to have ‘liked’ this post – let me clarify, I like your attitude, I don’t like how you are being treated. I mean where to even begin with a response, impossible. ‘You’ll turn him into a fairy’ – only Disney can do that people.

  3. This post angers me on so many levels. So much so words can’t actually describe what I want to try to say. I hope things change for you and you get to see your Grandson.

    • Thank you for your comment…we are finally allowed to speak with him on speaker phone after having no contact for about a year. Hopefully we can convince them that all we want to do is love our grandson. 🙂

      • That’s great news! Although it shouldn’t be like this in the first place 😦 ! Keep positive 🙂

  4. one of the reasons i subscribed to your blog is that you openly stated (somewhere) that you was a lesbian. it was very refreshing for me to read that, and, very important (i think) that this fact is not hidden as though it is evil.
    i am not a lesbian, at least in this life, but was drawn to your honest and amusing journaling. the fact that you are not english – i will forgive … 😉

    no doubt you have suffered, and will suffer more, for your honesty. i wish i were as brave …

    • I make absolutely no secret of the fact that I AM A MARRIED LESBIAN WITH FOUR CHILDREN AND A GRANDCHILD :)…I’m so far out of the closet that I can’t remember where it is. Thank you for your comment and your follow 🙂

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